For a long time I believed something was permanently wrong with me. Not wrong in the “I made bad choices” sense, wrong in the “I am built differently than people who can just walk away from this” sense. I’d hear stories about people who quit cold turkey and never looked back, and I’d think, that’s … More Your Brain Is Not Broken
I got really good at lying to myself. Not the obvious kind of lying. I wasn’t sitting there consciously making things up. It was subtler than that. My brain had developed this whole internal script, a set of stories that ran automatically whenever I was about to act out or when someone (or something) pressed … More The Story We Tell Ourselves
I remember the moment I decided, really decided, that I was done. I meant it. I felt the weight of it, the resolve. I told myself this was the last time, that tomorrow would be different, that I had enough self-control to just… stop. And then a few days later I was right back where … More Why You Can’t Just Stop
There is something humbling about returning to a place you left. I started this site with a clear purpose — to be a resource for those fighting their way out of sexual addiction. Then life moved fast, and the posts stopped. Five years passed. The site sat quiet while the world kept spinning and people … More Finding My Way Back
To gain recovery all addicts utilize some form of step work. But there is one crucial step that needs to be taken before that work begins. It is the moment of realization that there is a problem and we need to fix it. Before this realization, we know that there is a problem but we … More Awake
Who of us has not tried to overcome our addiction and yet always fell? We would decide enough is enough and grit our teeth, clench our fist, and out of sheer determination not act out again. How long did we last? For some, it may have been a few hours. Others, days weeks or maybe … More Will Power Is Not Enough
Current circumstances have left us isolated from others. Isolated from the support we need. Loneliness grips us all at times. For some, it is a daily companion. Others seem to be around people daily and still don’t get what their heart truly needs. Whether we know it or believe it, we need some form of … More Community
I created this website a few years ago, but I could not find the time to work on it. Now with the current state of the world, I am drawn back to my website to provide sanity for myself and help for others. As an addict, during times of stress, old patterns of medicating start … More New Start
Recently, as part of a webinar series, I was ask to make a dream board. A dream board is just a visual representation of things I want to accomplish. It could be as simple or extensive as someone wants it to be. I threw a few pictures up on a word document and I was … More Dream Board
I spoke with a guy the other day who seemed to be a person who had it all together. He was an open guy and would tell you how it is. It appeared that he was not able to be real with someone. He was open with people and very friendly. Yet he could not … More Truth or honest?
